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These are my thoughts, yo.

Funny Conversations Between Friends: This Text Thread Deserves To Be Famous

jasmine banks

Between Sadie and several of my other hilarious friends, I am always laughing. Well, usually... What I am saying is I have funny friends. And we say funny things. We have funny conversations.


Read on.


Betony I'm fooling myself in thinking wearing mascara to therapy is a good idea aren't I?


Jasmine Totally


Betony Well. YOLO?


Jasmine Best fucking text convo ever.


Betony I'll be doing raccoon impressions on the corner of West & Dickson. Peace out.


Jasmine You realize I am going to blog this, right? It deserves to be famous.


Betony I am fodder for you my dear.


Jasmine You are so much more than fodder.



Much later

Betony Haaay. I 'm sending you and instant bucket of calmies. 

Jasmine What the hell is that?

Betony Its like an imaginary smoothie if chill out you get to pour on little folk who are running amok. I'm using loads today. 

Betony I made it up.

Jasmine Lol, Am I running amok or are you?

Betony Well my kids are, aren't yours?

Jasmine A bit. I am more bored than they are. 

Betony Hand print turkeys? That's my last resort. Heh

Jasmine Think we are headed to the movies...


Much much later

Jasmine Happy white people stole more shit that didn't belong to them day ;)

Betony Sweet potato pieeeeeee

Jasmine Pecan Pie over here

Betony Have you seen the "girl you're giving me goosebumps parody on YouTube yet?

Jasmine My hands smell like ham

Betony That could be considered risque in some circles

Jasmine Not because I put my hand in my vagina

Jasmine ... wait. My vagina does NOT smell like ham...

Betony That is not at all what I was thinking.

Betony I am happy for you?

 Betony Ham Wallet.

Betony Hahahahaha

Jasmine Ham wallet lol!!

Betony I think the whole quote is "vulcanize the whoope stick in the ham wallet."

Jasmine Lol. Barf.