Sweet one, You can't experience joy, peace, and deep love because you are held back by your past. You keep putting up with all the things that make you feel awful. You keep believing it'll get better. He'll change, she'll change, they'll change... I can tough this out. It is just a season, you say. You keep denying your own pain because you don't want to feel it. But you do feel it. That is why you can't find rest in the late hours of the night. Tossing and turning. Eat away the pain. Exercise way the pain. Become so painstakingly busy that you can't think about the pain. It won't work... at least not for long. Each tiny wound cuts deeper and deeper into bigger wounds you've carried for so long already. Wounds that keep being ripped open don't heal.
Those wounds from the past won't just go away either. It takes being intentional. It takes believing you are worth the strife that results in change. Do you want to keep repeating the same lessons? Those wounds will get your attention eventually. Stop rewinding the same scenes from years and moments that have passed. Will you embrace healing? Will you prepare for good things. Will you move toward designing your life in preparation for healing?
Acceptance is a process. Processes have action and motion written into them. It is time you move forward.
You don't have to be afraid.