October catapulted me into single motherhood. I can't explain the details. Which is hard, since I am use to being so open. Suffice it to say in a matter of 48 hours I found out I was going to be a single mom. Three kids and just me. How do you prepare so something like that? That is just the thing. It is a fucking surprise so you don't prepare.
I hate surprises, y'all.
The thing is that we all learn to adjust. When you lose a limb, a loved one, a dream… you welcome a new kind of normal. The first week of single motherhood I worried that I would make all those mistakes I saw my mother make. The first step to defusing the bombs of fear and warped expectation is to acknowledge reality. I had to open my eyes wide and take in where me and my children were. I mean this literally and metaphorically. Once I determined the lay of land, so to speak, I felt I could navigate. I had to stop being occupied about what people would think about this part of our lives.
Only our opinions matter. Me. Addison. Isaiah. Tobias
So I am a single mom. SURPRISE!
Single motherhood is, by far, the worst surprise ever.